The Dingo ate your Baby!
by Lady Kale
Summary: What could happen when two hyper, random girls get bored and decide to write a story. Nothing. Right? WRONG! I'll tell you what can happen: Bella, Edward, her little boy, and a lunatic in a tutu!


Just to begin... this is a story written by me, Kale, and my buddy CullenLove95. Enjoy!

A/N:

Kale: I'm feeling Random…

CL95: WOW!! THAT'S SUCH A BIG CHANGE FROM NORMAL FOR YOU!!

Kale: Are you being facetious?

CL95: Faucet what?

Kale: Fa-ce-tious

CL95: STOP TALKING IN SWITERLAND-ISH!!

Kale: Uh……

CL95: Just tell me what it means already!!

Kale: Sarcastic.

CL95: I was not being sarcastic!!

Kale: No. It means sarcastic.

CL95: Oh….. Wait why are we arguing/being confused?

Kale: Because we're being random.

CL95: Oh yeah!!

Kale: Now what?

CL95: LET'S WRITE A STORY!!

Kale: YEAH!!

CL95: Don't forget, I just became the heir to the twilight saga, and Stephanie "just so happened" to die.

Kale: And I'm the supreme ruler of the world!!

CL95: YEAH!!

Kale: YEAH!!

CL95: Okay… Not really.

Kale: Aw man! –Sobs--

CL95: Does this count as a disclaimer? I really don't want to be sued.

Kale: I guess. But just in case……

Both: DON'T SUE US!! (We don't own it.)

Now on with the main event!!

* * *

It was a regular normal afternoon for Bella, Edward, and their son Anthony. As normal as it could be for a family with a vampire for a father, klutz for a mother, and a three year old boy. Bella was sitting in the kitchen feeding Anthony his favorite meal.

All of a sudden….

…..

…..

…..

BAM!!

….

….

….

--Sound that glass breaking makes—

….

…..

….

…..

……

……

--nutcracker theme song.—

…

..

.

All of a sudden…

….

…

A guy in a tutu, tights, and a trench coat, and a tiara jumped in the window.

In a sudden movement he grabbed the baby and said in a strangely Australian accent, "I got your baby!"

He shoved Anthony in his coat and pirouetted out the window, leaving Bella in the chair with a spoon held up in midair.

She sat there completely frozen for a while. Literally quite a while. Seriously, it was a while. Then, she snapped out of it and screamed at the top of her lungs, "EDWARD!!"

Edward ran into the room at vampire speed and was wondering what was going on because Bella never yells. After all who would need to with vampire hearing? "What is it Bella?? Where did Anthony go? Why is the window broken?? And, what is with the spoon?" He asked just babbling out questions as he noticed things.

Bella said so fast he had to strain to catch it, "A LUNA1TIC IN A TUTU WITH AN ODD AUSTRALIAN ACCENT JUST JUMPED IN THE WINDOW AND TOOK OUR BABY!!"

Edward said, "Bella… seriously. Just tell me what happened and I'll-"

But he was cut off by nutcracker music. The guy was back!! He said, "I'm sorry, but the dingo ate your baby."

Edward was frozen in shock, but Bella on the other hand… Bella gave a battle cry and pulled a medieval sword out of nowhere and tackled the lunatic out the window.

Edward finally snapped out of it and cried, "I'm coming Bella!!" He jumped out the window after her and saw her with the sword at the guy's neck. He grabbed the guy and moved Bella out of the way.

He was about to punch the guy, when they all heard a strange sound. They all turned their heads and saw Anthony with a tail sticking out of his mouth.

Edward was really confused, but Bella stood up and looked like she was about to chop the lunatics head off. Mr. Lunatic-dude said, "My mistake, it appears the baby ate the dingo!"

Before Bella could do anything I told her, "Go and get… the dingo out of Anthony's mouth. I'll keep this guy right here."  
Bella nodded and ran over to Anthony. "Spit that out!! Right no- I said spit that out!! So help me, Anthony, if you don't spit that out…" Bella yelled, but Anthony ran over to her and spat the dingo out.

The only thing was… it was a stuffed animal dingo.

The lunatic had the nerve to say, "Did I mention it was stuffed??"  
Edward was so mad that he flicked him on the side of the head with enough force to knock him out.

As soon as he did Bella ran over to Anthony and picked him up. "Well, now what?" She wondered out loud.

Edward gave a huge sigh and said, "Well, I guess we give him to Carlisle to put in the crazy ward in the hospital."

"Okay… let's go." And, hand in hand, they went back to their "normal" lives.

* * *

A/N: Mwuah ha ha!! Our totally awesome story has come to an end... or so you think... Question is do ya like it? Love it? Please tell us! If you do CL95 will give you a cookie! And if you don't... I'll hunt you down!!


End file.
